Wednesday, July 23, 2014
There are many phases in our lives and at different phases, and in this different phases we would have different wants and needs. Say for example, during poly days I used to think that guys who wore red wings were super cool yet now, I kinda go "urghh yucks" at the sight of guys wearing them? Even these days when I look at a picture of an outfit I wore a few days back, I would cringe and wonder why I even chose that outfit. Hahah kinda funny looking back though. You start laughing at your choices and decisions, wondering why you even did that. Yet at that point in time, it was everything you wanted or could care about. I guess its really true that time does "heal" everything, even if its not a wound. So for now, I can only wish that two/three/four months down the road, I will look back and laugh at myself for being so silly.
Wednesday, July 16, 2014
We are all human and everyone has flaws. Some insensitive people just go around commenting on others, shooting their mouths away without considering that others have feelings too. "Why your boobs so flat?" "Your tummy is showing" "eeee you got no butt" I think these words are said so easily today, without thinking twice. But no one is perfect. If u want someone perfect, go date a Barbie doll? Oh wait, maybe Barbie isn't perfect enough either. These comments may be said jokingly, or just casually but consequences go a long way. I know of true stories of how girls have become anorexic and almost lost her life cause of a 14 year old boy's ignorant idiotic comment on how she was "fat". Fat? What is fat? Maybe that's why I find humans so disgusting sometimes and I'm ashamed to be one.
Sunday, July 13, 2014
Thursday, July 10, 2014
Everyone knows, okay perhaps not everyone but only people close to me, would know how I am a sucker for romantic stuffs, korean dramas, the whole prince charming in shining armour/frog prince package. I would really like to blame it on disney, or the whole korean drama for leading me to live in this whole warped idea of love/relationships or whatever kind. But when young, as a young kid of course the whole princess-y thing is what makes up your childhood. How about when a person gets older? Did this disney thing lead us to have a false idea of happily ever afters? Do happily ever afters even exist? Or perhaps disney mentioned that the prince and princess lived happily ever after, but with each other? Or they probably forgot to mention all the arguments, disputes experienced, hurt feelings. Cause after all, some things are better left unsaid? It was actually all good till a few years ago I found out the "truth" about little mermaid and I got so affected, I cried. I didn't know why i got so affected then and kinda went "thats bullshit", but thinking back, it might actually be true?
Someone very important was telling me that day that what is shown in korean dramas, don't happen and thats why we watch them. Cause they never happen in real life. There's no kissing in the rain, running after another on a bus, cooking porridge when the other is sick and staying by their side. Well, and people don't wake up looking that good or even when drenched in water/mud, smelling that great, for the matter right? People kiss, but not in the rain. People kiss cause maybe they are drunk? Or cause they just want to? When people get sick, a "take care, drink more water, remember to take your medicine" text is probably one of the best you can expect. Guys in the korean dramas don't want much physical contact from you, perhaps just a kiss and then next scene! In real life? I can't be too sure its the same. People have morning breath when they wake up, and cmon, they're hair isn't always perfectly styled, and clothed in such fancy pyjamas. More of rags? Hahahahah.
But then again, if you are able to accept the good and bad, then thats what you call real love right? And thats the whole challenge. Love isn't easy. Nobody said it was. Its definitely not as easy as saying it. Everyone can say it, few can mean it. It can be shown in many different ways. Does not necessarily need to be in a particular way that is conventional, cause different people have different ways of showing it. It might not be very obvious, might not be the way you want it to be, but whatever it is, when its real you will know it. There's no right or wrong.
Its been ages since I visited this space of mine, there were many times I typed words but yet somehow never ever clicked on the "publish" button. Its mostly bits and pieces of thoughts from here, there and everywhere. But never ever a proper post. Or perhaps I just rather keep these thoughts to myself, hide them inside me.
Life has been pretty mundane for me, definitely less fancy, less colourful. But somehow I am just choosing to let things be, preferring to let things be as they are and continuing to wait. Wait for what? I don't know. I don't know what life has in store for me next, so we'll see how it goes. For now, I am just slacking away, waking up everyday and just seeing what plans there are for me every day. I wonder how long this is gonna last, I kinda wish this whole "i don't know where I am heading to" phase will stop. But then again, would I be able to handle everything that comes charging my way if there was a change?
Time is passing way too quickly for my liking and literally in a blink of an eye, its July. Wow, did half a year just go by like that? What have I done this half year I ask myself. Nothing? A lot of things? Mehh, I can't be too sure I liked this year or when I look back on 31 dec 2014, will I look back wishing time would come to a standstill or wishing 2015 would hurry come, for a new brand new start ahead.
Oh what am I ranting about now? These words don't even seem to make sense.
Wednesday, June 25, 2014
To be honest, I've never celebrated my birthday without my family before in my whole entire life and this year, when I learnt that I was going to be ALL ALONE in brisbane and that my birthday was in the middle of my exams, I was superrrrrrrrrr sad and moody. The day before, I was already kinda all teary and whinyyyyy, complaining on the phone non-stop to my poor mother. So minutes before 12 midnight on my birthday itself, I was cooped up in my room, dressed in my pjs and whining on the phone to my mom when... MY FRIENDS BURST INTO MY ROOM wishing me Happy Birthday??! I was super shocked that I couldnt stop screaming and all I did was continue to hide under my blanket. -.- yes, whats wrong with me? Then the first thing my friends said was "are u dressed decently??!?" Hahahahhaha. And I even had TWO cakes to blow! Apparently, one was partly from my mother! My mother had been contacting my friend here and secretly planned this surprise for me. Awww, I was super touched cause I didnt expect my friends to come surprise me??! OMGGGG.
Im super grateful to God for sending these angels into my life! (*ps you know who you are, especially the one sitting next to me reading this now and laughing non stop.)
Saturday, June 21, 2014
“Once upon a time there was a crooked tree and a straight tree. And they grew next to each other. And every day the straight tree would look at the crooked tree and he would say, ‘You’re crooked. You’ve always been crooked and you’ll continue to be crooked. But look at me! Look at me!’ said the straight tree. He said, ‘I’m tall and I’m straight.’ And then one day the lumberjacks came into the forest and looked around, and the manager in charge said, ‘Cut all the straight trees.’ And that crooked tree is still there to this day, growing strong and growing strange.”
Tom Waits, Wristcutters: A Love Story
Thursday, June 12, 2014
The Jolly Attic is a new blogshop that has recently been established and do support them!
I was really happy to be approached by the really friendly owner to be able to share this upcoming lovely shop with you guys!
I chose the below three pieces from their collection!
^ Nightfall Abstract Dress
I think shift dresses are really one of the best things ever invented. Doesn't make you look sloppy at all, in fact, its pretty dressy yet super convenient because you don't have to worry about matching the tops and bottom. And its not those body-fitting kind so you don't have to worry too much after a heavy satisfying meal.
This one from @thejollyattic is made of super good quality! I swear. I was kinda shocked when i received it cause the quality is comparable to those branded shops (think, Zara? okay its even better than Zara actually.)
^ Noir Eyelets Crop Tee
This eyelet top is really pretty upclose! It has this flowery design, though you can't really tell from far. And match it any denim shorts or jeans and taadaa, ready to do!
^ Allover Floral Crop Tee
As you can tell, (check above), I really do like cropped tops. I always pair them with my high waisted shorts. And most of my clothes have prints. I am seldom seen in solid colours. Anything floral, abstract and I like it. So of course I immediately laid my eyes on this and had to get this piece! Okay, I admit I am bias towards floral prints.
Follow them on Instagram and their Facebook for updates!
Some of their new arrivals which are really pretty that I have personally picked out!
Time for you to shop now! :)
Friday, June 6, 2014
I wanna live in a blue and white coloured wooden beach house with a large porch, with one of those big swings you can sit on to look out to the ocean. On those swings, there will be white cushions and probably cans of coke left behind from the night before. There will be lots of baby cactuses all around and they won't die in my hands, cause well, they are cactuses for a reason. And it would make me happy that they survived cause I would like to believe its cause I took good care of them though everyone probably knows why. And I would have a crazy lover? Should I call him lover? Well, cause the term boyfriend tends to lead too much heartbreaks and complications. So yes, lover though it sounds kinda sleazy but definitely not. I'll have lots of dogs, or maybe just one. So I ll focus all my attention on him. And we'll go play in the ocean together with the waves and I ll overcome my stupid fear of stepping on sand beds. The dog will have dinner with us, both good and terrible dinners, and sleep with us in bed. My lover and I will take turns to cook terrible dishes for each other and argue over who does the dishes but hopefully he'll let me win but I'll feel bad and help out. I'll know each and every corner of the house. Every item handpicked by us, with a story behind. Then every night we'll sit by the porch, huddled together in my blanky and talk about everything, anything. And I'll probably be able to recognise more constellations by then.
Sigh, daydreaming again. Me and my ideas.
Sorry for the major lack of updates in this dead space, but I am still alive and well, kicking. I've been struggling with the piles of assignments and dealing with, owells, being homesick. I miss home. :( But not too long till I get back to Singapore and I really really can't wait for time to pass. I miss my dogs. I miss my family. I miss going back home to home (yes, if that even makes sense to you).
I seldom head out these days. The times I head out is probably to get food cause I ran out of my rations. But of course I still go out once in awhile to maintain my life. The sight of maggi mee kinda puts me off now, even just by looking at it. I am really craving for some real authentic home-cooked food. Lotus root soup? Or even Yati's sometimes overcooked vegetables. I miss them. And my riceee. No words can ever ever describe how much I LOVE rice. I really love rice so much, just give me rice and sauce and I am already a very satisfied girl.
Then what do I do? Well, I end up being a sushi. Hahahahhahaha. My bed is the rice, I am probably the wasabi in-between, and my big heavy blanket is the salmon sashimi on top. Hahahaha I really like this analogy. I think it fits perfectly. Other than that, I do random stuffs in this small abode of mine, which I hate to do it, but have to, call it "home" in this foreign land. Though my real home is definitely x100000 times filled with more warmth and love than this nest. Or maybe a nest which a tornado has swept through with all the wreckages and remnants around. Urgh. But then again, I cant complain about this nest of mine filled with lots of ice-cream. Mars bar ice cream, crunchy ice-cream bars, Bulla coconut, gelato, hahahaha they keep me somewhat, alive and maintain my level of sanity.
I realised that staying at home and being alone is actually, nice? Sometimes, in fact I rather stay in my nest than head out. I just wanna spend some time on my own, doing my own shittzzzz and just chilling. The me two years ago would probably have disagreed and protested in great disbelief. But maybe this is part of getting old? I no longer feel a Need to go out. I am actually happy staying in my nest. Wait, tornado-stricken nest to be exact.
Sunday, May 25, 2014
25th May 2014
Knitwear from Wonderstellar
Necklace from Shop6by6
Top from H&M
Shoes from Topshop
Today something suddenly got into me and I decided to head down to Coles to grab some groceries to cook pasta! I have never been a fan of western food, always preferred my chinese and japanese food. But I always felt that pasta was way easier to cook, or perhaps its cause I seldom even try to cook chinese food. Cause you just need to boil the spaghetti and heat up the pasta sauce. But I definitely put in more effort for this pasta meal and added in other ingredients! Sent it to the family group chat and everyone was praising me. Teehee. Happy that I can make my parents proud! :) Maybe I shall cook for them when i get back? But I always say that but never do so.
Sighhh, I miss home cooked food, I miss home. :(
Wednesday, May 21, 2014
Sometimes I gotta keep reminding myself that life is made up of moments. Moments of impact, as quoted by the Vow which I have watched 5 times till date. *no judging please* I have to constantly remind myself that I almost went to a different school, almost had a different group of friends, almost died in a car accident, almost ended up in a different country. Yet here I am, being where I am and facing the consequences of these moments. Our lives which is so called "defined" "fixed" are actually highly dependant on these moments that could have led to something totally different to what we have now. Happenstance, thats what they call it. These moments which are only made up of a few seconds, yet have the ability to change one's entire life. You gotta be really careful of them. Cause some of them are irreversible.